MAHATHIR, ANWAR AND SOROS (THE MAS JOKE)
One lousy day in the middle of the economic crisis, PM Mahathir was feeling extremely frustrated and wondering how a neighbouring country could be doing better than Malaysia. One of his aides told him, "I heard that their leaders consult Feng Shui masters to ensure prosperity for the country."
Dr. M thought that in that case Malaysia Boleh also, and called in the country's top bomoh to get his advice.
After reviewing the situation, the bomoh told Dr. M that there were two things that he must do.
Bomoh: Step No. 1. You must blame the crisis on SOROS.
Dr. M: But why?
Bomoh: Because SOROS stands for Speculate On Ringgit Or Stocks. You must blame him, and look for ways to control the ringgit and the stock market.
Dr. M: And the next step?
Bomoh: Step No. 2. You must get rid of ANWAR.
Dr. M: What? Why him?
Bomoh: Because ANWAR stands for A Nation Without Any Ringgit.
Dr. M: But how? That will be difficult as he is very popular.
Bomoh: Aiyoh, you bodoh! Just look at your name, MAHATHIR. Make Anwar Homosexual And Then Highlight It Repeatedly!
Monday, December 30, 2002
Mahathir was so disappointed with his cabinet for being inefficient, corrupt and with the current economic going very bad he decided to call on Goh Chok Tong and ask him how he managed to have such an efficient and uncorruptable cabinet.
On hearing Mahathir's woes, PM Goh said, "Simple, Mahathir, I choose able men for my cabinet."
Mahathir asked, "Yes, but how do you know that they are able?"
PM Goh replied, "Just ask them simple questions to test their intelligence. Don't need to be too difficult. Let me illustrate to you."
Just then, Tony Tan was walking by. PM Goh called out to him. "Hey Tony, come over here." Tony obediently walked briskly over.
PM Goh asked, "Tell me, Tony, who is your father's son ?" Tony Tan immediately replied, "Me! Of course."
PM Goh turned to Mahathir and said, "See, all my ministers can answer this question. Why don't you go back and try." Mahathir thank PM Goh and left.
Once he was back, he immediately summoned Anwar, his deputy, and shot the question at him.
"Tell me, Anwar, who is your father's son ?"
Anwar was shocked beyond words and did not know the answer. After a while, he recovered and said, "Boss, let me find out and I'll tell you tomorrow." Mahathir, a bit disappointed, agreed, hoping that Anwar will give a good answer tomorrow.
Meanwhile, Anwar was panicking that his boss was testing him. He tried desperately to find out the answer from his staff, but none of them knew the answer.
The next morning, he decided to call Bill Clinton for help. Surely the most powerful person in the world must know the answer.
When Bill picked up the phone, Anwar said, "Hello, Bill, can I ask you a question?" Clinton, very busy, replied, "Alright, but it better be good!" Anwar quickly asked, "Tell me, Bill, who is your father's son ?" Clinton was fuming, "Of course it's me, you stupid !" And he slammed the phone down.
Satisfied that he's got the answer, he confidently walked into Mahathir's office and said, "Boss, I've got the answer to your question."
Mahathir, happy that his deputy wasn't that dumb, said, "So tell me quick, who is your father's son, Anwar ?"
Anwar confidently replied, "It's BILL CLINTON !"
Mahathir slapped his own forehead in disgust and said, "No you stupid, it's TONY TAN !"
On hearing Mahathir's woes, PM Goh said, "Simple, Mahathir, I choose able men for my cabinet."
Mahathir asked, "Yes, but how do you know that they are able?"
PM Goh replied, "Just ask them simple questions to test their intelligence. Don't need to be too difficult. Let me illustrate to you."
Just then, Tony Tan was walking by. PM Goh called out to him. "Hey Tony, come over here." Tony obediently walked briskly over.
PM Goh asked, "Tell me, Tony, who is your father's son ?" Tony Tan immediately replied, "Me! Of course."
PM Goh turned to Mahathir and said, "See, all my ministers can answer this question. Why don't you go back and try." Mahathir thank PM Goh and left.
Once he was back, he immediately summoned Anwar, his deputy, and shot the question at him.
"Tell me, Anwar, who is your father's son ?"
Anwar was shocked beyond words and did not know the answer. After a while, he recovered and said, "Boss, let me find out and I'll tell you tomorrow." Mahathir, a bit disappointed, agreed, hoping that Anwar will give a good answer tomorrow.
Meanwhile, Anwar was panicking that his boss was testing him. He tried desperately to find out the answer from his staff, but none of them knew the answer.
The next morning, he decided to call Bill Clinton for help. Surely the most powerful person in the world must know the answer.
When Bill picked up the phone, Anwar said, "Hello, Bill, can I ask you a question?" Clinton, very busy, replied, "Alright, but it better be good!" Anwar quickly asked, "Tell me, Bill, who is your father's son ?" Clinton was fuming, "Of course it's me, you stupid !" And he slammed the phone down.
Satisfied that he's got the answer, he confidently walked into Mahathir's office and said, "Boss, I've got the answer to your question."
Mahathir, happy that his deputy wasn't that dumb, said, "So tell me quick, who is your father's son, Anwar ?"
Anwar confidently replied, "It's BILL CLINTON !"
Mahathir slapped his own forehead in disgust and said, "No you stupid, it's TONY TAN !"
Have fun ...... the joke is a bit sexy.
A nun and a priest were crossing the Sahara
desert on a camel. On the third day out, the
camel suddenly dropped dead without warning.
After dusting themselves off, the nun and the
priest surveyed their situation. After a long
period of silence, the priest spoke. "Well,
sister, this looks pretty grim."
"I know, Father. In fact, I don't think it likely
that we can survive more than a day or two."
"I agree," says the Father, "Sister, since we are
unlikely to make it out of here alive, would you
do something for me?"
"Anything father."
"I have never seen a woman's breasts and I was
wondering if I might see yours."
"Well, under the circumstances I don't see that
it would do any harm."
The nun opened her habit and the priest enjoyed
the sight of her shapely breasts, commenting
frequently on their beauty.
"Sister would you mind if I touched them?" She
consented and he fondled them for several
minutes.
"Father, could I ask something of you?"
"Yes sister?"
"I have never seen man's privates. Could I see
yours?"
"I supposed that would be OK," the priest
replied, lifting his robe.
"Oh father, may I touch it?"
This priest consented and after a few minutes of
fondling, he was sporting a huge erection.
"Sister, you know that if I insert my privates in
the right place, it can give life."
"Is that true father?"
"Yes, it is, sister."
"Then why don't you stick it in that camel and
let's get the hell out of here?"
A nun and a priest were crossing the Sahara
desert on a camel. On the third day out, the
camel suddenly dropped dead without warning.
After dusting themselves off, the nun and the
priest surveyed their situation. After a long
period of silence, the priest spoke. "Well,
sister, this looks pretty grim."
"I know, Father. In fact, I don't think it likely
that we can survive more than a day or two."
"I agree," says the Father, "Sister, since we are
unlikely to make it out of here alive, would you
do something for me?"
"Anything father."
"I have never seen a woman's breasts and I was
wondering if I might see yours."
"Well, under the circumstances I don't see that
it would do any harm."
The nun opened her habit and the priest enjoyed
the sight of her shapely breasts, commenting
frequently on their beauty.
"Sister would you mind if I touched them?" She
consented and he fondled them for several
minutes.
"Father, could I ask something of you?"
"Yes sister?"
"I have never seen man's privates. Could I see
yours?"
"I supposed that would be OK," the priest
replied, lifting his robe.
"Oh father, may I touch it?"
This priest consented and after a few minutes of
fondling, he was sporting a huge erection.
"Sister, you know that if I insert my privates in
the right place, it can give life."
"Is that true father?"
"Yes, it is, sister."
"Then why don't you stick it in that camel and
let's get the hell out of here?"
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